The Dutch Fred Flintstone
Why do I bother?I had a date with the Dutchman - you know, the one I met when out with the girls a couple weeks ago. Tell me, did he have that black tooth when I met him at 5 am in a downtown bar? Did he smoke like a chimney then? Did he excitedly finish every sentence with a fist banged on the table as if a punctuation mark? Did he have those big, wide-wristed paw hands like Fred Flintstone's? Was his shirt too small to cover his belly then? Did he.. oh who cares?
My beer goggles must have been pretty fogged-up that night.
Don't get me wrong, he's a very nice man. Smart, witty, kind, intelligent, not terrible looking (as long as he doesn't smile), tall, enthusiastic, gentle, polite - you know, all the stuff I want in a man. But he's got something against him - besides the Darth Vader tooth.
He's only 31. I knew I wouldn't like him purely for that reason. I just can't get my head around dating younger men. I just can't feel good about it. I need for the guys I date to understand that I learned to dance from my brother to The Doobie Brothers song Black Water (you know, Old black water, keep on rollin Mississippi moon, wonÂt you keep on shinin on me).
I want to hang with someone who won't cringe when I say I have seen The Police in Concert - opening for the Go-Gos no less. And definitely want someone who DOESN'T say - 'Who are the Go-Gos?'
Nice guys like The Dutch Fred Flintstone don't deserve the punishment of my 41 years of well crafted prejudices. They don't deserve to have me dismiss their re-crafted version of history as they know it.
Man's first steps on the moon in 1969 - My parents let me stay up late to watch coverage of that - on a fuzzy black and white TV. Riots in DC. Tear gas on the mall to disperse the Vietnam War protesters on the 4th of July. Reagan being shot at the Hilton Hotel down the street from Mom and Dad's house. ShantyTowns at University protesting Aparthied in South Africa, where we were when the shuttle exploded, glued to the CNN coverage of the Berlin wall being smashed graffiti-coloured bits.
The young ones don't deserve to hear why I can't stand their idol Madonna (a European favourite)- she's like Disney (another European favourite) - Both have been shoved down American's throats for ages. I am SO over her, done, dusted - put some clothes on and eat a cookie Woman!
When I look at it from another room, I do think I come off sounding sort of like an old fart-ess. But I am not. I just have standards. And I want a guy my own age who looks and acts younger a lot of the time, has a penchant for being naughty and
definitely has a sophisticated palette. Fred Flintstone was extraordinarily impressed with my local bistro - they give you cloth serviettes. Well cooked, nice, basic food - a departure from his frites and kebap after the bars routine.
Oh well, the search is still on. And I am getting a bit uncomfortable. This bird flu thing is popping up here and there - birds migrating over to Europe for the spring. Please don't let it hamper my roasted chicken habit...please
posted by Brussels Confidential @ 9:54 AM
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