Brussels Confidential

Jungle Drawer gets a make over

My lovely housekeeper comes on Tuesdays. She's only in my house for a few hours a week, but that's just enough for me. She's a very pretty, young Polish woman who is a meticulous cleaner. She has a particular fondness for tidying things like shelves and cupboards.

She worked over the holiday period and even though I was in DC, I left her a few projects to complete. I came home to a kitchen organised with military preciseness -I can now actually count how many pairs of chopsticks I own - way more than I need as it turns out, well, way more than anyone needs really.

I asked her to tidy up my closet - where I have a huge pile of sweaters about 3 feet high. Somehow they get tried-on and thrown back in the closet and never refolded, not sure how that happens...do I do that?? YA

Anyway, I told her not to bother with the drawers - I mean - come on, how could I ask someone else to tackle jungle drawer anyway - I would be embarrassed.

So, imagine my horror when I came home from work last night and found that she had completely organised and tidied my jungle drawer. Not only am I horrified that someone did that chore for me, but I am horrified that someone has seen my stash of sexy lingerie.

She folded my regular daily panties into the size of postage stamps and lined them up by colour on one side of the drawer - a novel experience for me - I can actually see my huge selection of under garments! The slightly less fabric-y items - like thongs and stuff, are so perfectly packed in the drawers it puts Victoria's Secret to shame. My thing-highs are all tucked in to small parcels and easy to find.

No more digging around in a frantic spazz when trying to find sexy lingerie to throw on - in order to pretend to my date that I had the stuff on all night while we were out.

Now I can see everything. I have a LOT of lingerie. I feel obligated to wear everything just to get it out a bit. Give those bustiers a bit of a runway trip through the bedroom. Get those garters snapping over the Christmas thighs and figure out what in the hell that silky, strappy, slinky thingy is for....

This is actually going to be a real project. I think this should be done systematically. I think I need volunteers to help me with this project. I shall start to interview prospective volunteers this weekend...

posted by Brussels Confidential @ 9:55 AM