Wonky
Every once in a while things go wonky. I've just had a wonky week - although I am scared to use past tense for fear that wonky is still a present tense situation....
Names of the 4 rabbits in the children's story The Tale of Peter Rabbit kept running through my brain this week. - you know: Flopsy, Mopsy Cottontail and Peter.
I was Flopsy - I fell down a couple times and at times felt like a rag doll with no muscles - therefore flopsy. Last Sunday, I slipped on a lovely 'gift' Bunny dog left for me in the middle of the stairway. I crash landed on my lower ribs and back, and then thumped down step by step. It was one of those falls where you have to sit for a few minutes to determine whether or not you're seriously injured. The bruise is still tender to the touch.
I felt pretty wobbly and flopsy for the rest of the week largely due to that. This week I ever so slightly lost control of a couple scallop shells filled with scallops, bechamel sauce and cheese topping, I couldn't possibly drop them and have a clearable mess to clean up. Not me, I awkwardly manhandled and mis-ballanced them all the way down my legs trying to stop them from hitting the floor by pinning them between my thighs and the kitchen counter. A huge mess. And like a Mr. Bean episode.
I knocked glasses off tables, I dropped bags, boxes, papers, pens, full cups of tea, turned over bowls of cereal and spurted yogurt all over myself when opening a pot the other day. I bought a super jumbo pack of light bulbs so I wouldn't run low and dropped them by accident on the pavement right outside the shop.
I was Mopsy - well, you can't have a flopsy week without being mopsy. I had to mop the downstairs floor 6 times this week. Between my flopsiness and Bunny Dog's dogginess I couldn't win. So it was really OK when the cap split off the bottle of floor cleaner and splashed all over the house - needed it anyway.
I was Cottontail - I went out on Saturday night with friends. I had 'it' that night. That special something that works like a man magnet once in a while - I clearly thought I was the cutest and hottest bunny out there. (And I was fer shur) Everyone loved my dancing and I was surrounded by 5 good looking men all evening (I was).
That was me!! Sweet loveable Cottontail by night!!
The next morning however, more like - horrendous, monster, screeching, Cotton-MOUTH. URF. wa, wa-t, wa-, wat, wat-er .....gasp.
On to Peter. There's nothing to tie in to Peter unless the guy Cottontail was chatting up at 2 in the morning at Archiduc the other night was named Peter...but I don't think so. (Think it was something horrifying like Guido- no offense to people named Guido, but you know...). Beer goggles should be illegal don'tchya think?
So that's the story of my wonky week. I am sorry to tell you I just tripped in the office, fell on to my desk and broke my favourite tea cup, and my mobile phone just died. Wonky's not over yet.
posted by Brussels Confidential @ 2:07 PM
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